The Naked Troll Project

Different Approach

2007-01-26T16:22:00.000-05:00

This time through I'm going through the quests and actually enjoying it considering its new content. This will drastically slow my progression from 60-70. I am just about two bubbles away and after I level I'm going to be heading into the swamplands.

I just got a new videocard and ram that I am extensivly testing to make sure its fine so I dont have to return anything again.

I can't play much today due to stress testing my system and work.

Burning Crusade Day 1

2007-01-24T16:16:00.000-05:00

I logged back in for the first time in about a month, I patched up and was really excited to go. I select Mal'Ganis and am immediatly greeted with the familiar queue. I immediatly make a blood elf paladin because I can't resist trying out something new for the first time since I've started the naked troll project. I lasted about 10 minutes in blood elf newbie land. Its a complete acid trip, theres constrasting colors everywhere. I saw a big floating angry face, brooms sweeping around, flying mana fish and a plethora of anime styled characters running around screaming profanities. It was a frightening and strange technicolor place, I know I will have to return there someday. Then I made a Draeni shaman, it was much more grounded in reality and less the madness created after the artists drop acid and yell at each other for a while about what they saw. I'm gonna have to say I love the feel of the Draeni characters more so than any other mainly because they are so different. They even have their own accents which I thought was a nice touch. The area had kind of the same look and feel that the undead starting area did with the same journey down a hill into civilization. Except with giant purple crystals from their space ship or whatever these guys slammed into the planet. Luckilly the starting zone is filled with what can only be described as tiny tiny mothras.

So now that I was done with a brief trip to try out the new races I decided, screw this I'ma get to 70 and then try out these new wonderful things. I log on Juffowup and start wandering around to my usual hunting spots and then I realize, wait a minute... where are the outlands? So after about an hour of asking people how to get to the outlands they tell me that I have to go through the dark portal in the blasted lands. I really should have known that but I thought it would be too obvious. So I approach the dark portal I have a sinking feeling in my gut as I come closer to the whirling vortex of terror. I enter and through it lies a blasted destroyed world, and a gigantic staircase. I wonder why blizzard loves putting decents in their artistic and thematic choices. So I go stumble around and see this massive fight between the largest things I've ever seen shooting fireballs and things everywhere, but then I notice that there is quest givers and just ignore the fracas in front of me. I babble with them for a while and get sent off to the first town in this new wretched place. On my way there I fly over gaps that lead on forever and I look up to see a glowing ring pulsing through space. Dont know what that stuff is but it looks cool. I'm really hoping they have really impressive environments like they did with the rest of the game. So I arrive at the next town and go stumble around getting quests and killing monsters which gives me an interesting feeling since 60 is the new 50. I don't have the all powerfull feeling I had before and I feel like I need to be sheltered and protected in this hostile environment. Another thing to note is I'm pretty sure level 70's will stomp the shit out level 10's I fear for the lives of newbies everywhere. So I'm fighting things and lo and behold this crazy penis beast lunges out of the ground and starts bashing me to death. So I immediatly send some paniced message to guild chat along the lines of, "SHIT GUYS I GOT ATTACKED BY A FUCKING PENIS! WHAT THE HELL!?" Nobody responded. I think my guild has really died down in fun levels since I left, I dunno. Either way I got attacked by a giant phallic critter and I feel violated. I'm 2 bubbles into 60 now.

Interesting Fact:
-I think I am actually going to enjoy this.
-Is there going to be a vagina monster too?
-That creature in the image is the legenadry penisarus.

GOD DAMNIT WHYY!!!

2007-01-21T21:36:00.000-05:00

I was wandering around in my local gamestop and I started talking to the clerk about videogames and why command and conquer kicks ass. It turns out that he saw me in massive magazine and said, "Wait a minute, you are the naked guy?" So he freaks out and goes, "GIVE ME YOUR SIGNATURE!" So I do because I'm an egotistical fucker and can't help but stroke my ego at every turn.

So here is the recap: Up untill moments ago I was planning to leave WoW forever in favor of one of their new competitors Vanguard. That all came crashing to a halt when I got a taste of local fame. Which gives me enough of a high to want to continue playing WoW in order to feed my addiction. I know for a fact that people have stopped reading this blog as the counter on the bottom left hand corner has stopped moving. I can hopefully re kindle this with my triumphant return to World of Elfcraft.

I'm currently updating and hoping my guild hasnt booted me for a month of inactivity. Cause well it turns out wow might just be serious business. What I would love to happen is to get sponsored by someone so I can be like... Yay I dont have to pay 15 a month.

FUCK.... Back to the grind!

Interesting Facts:
-Jake will be happy that I've come back
-I want to die
-Please somebody stop blizzard from making more of this shit.

Naked Troll Project

2006-12-23T02:28:00.000-05:00

Going dormant with sporadic posts till the release of Burning Brusade.

Regular posts will return after that date.

Naked Troll Project in Massive Magazine, I'm on page 22. Go buy your copy today... Its 6 bucks or so.

Thanksgiving Mega-Chowdown-Post

2006-11-23T10:54:00.000-05:00

This post has LOTS of bad language so its more fun.

Alright it took me longer than Sunday to post because I am still reeling from camping out in front of Best Buy like an idiot. I think I've developed a allergy to chocolate and a fear of the cold. Luckily I was able to chronicle this event with all the paper I brought to do my homework on, which I clearly did not do. If you want to read my analysis on the Wii just skip right on down to the end of this post. I was camping out with my two buddies Tim and Elena.

Friday 2:51 PM

It is fairly nice out although slightly chilly. I showed up at 1:00 PM and I was the first in line until Tim and Elena showed up. The reaction from the sales staff is fairly encouraging. They said they would party with us tonight. Tim and Elena left about 15 minutes ago thus securing my place in line. The tent is comfortable and kinda cozy though I do not believe we will actually have to camp out for this thing. Supposedly the news will be back here again, I hope for irony's sake that Tim and Elena miss it. The public reaction seems to be fairly nice though Tim's mom showed up in a boiling rage and threatened to call the police. I believe this is an idle threat and I would not like to be here alone for 3 days. I am afraid of being robbed, however I really have nothing to take. They can have the tent and the useless crap Tim brought. The Pepsi will be useful in ensuring that I do not go mad and lose too much fluids in this ordeal. I have brought plenty of paper to record this event and will be taking pictures. Supposedly there will be a meteor shower tomorrow, I am very excited for this. As a side note children cry for no reason aside from the need to cry. Since I am a horrible person I thought this was funny so I took a picture of it.

Friday 8:00 PM

People keep asking about the PS3s and I keep having to tell them that we are camping out for the damn Wii. Also something interesting to note is that weird scene goth kids hang out at best buy. I find it fairly comforting and calming just watching people go by. Sometimes I talk to them and it ranges in topics anywhere from why the hell I'm camping out to politics. Fox news showed up and interviewed the people who waited in line for the past 3 days. They ended up buying 3 PS3's which the immediately ebayed. I love the feeling of being inside the tent with the doors up and hearing them comment as they walk by. The cops never showed up from that threat before. I cannot wait for this to be over, already I am going to be sexiled tomorrow. I wish Tim could have found someone other than Elena to bring. Or say if I had a buddy or a companion, but alas I feel like the third wheel on a bike. This is the third time today they have abandoned me. I think I rightfully get the first Wii due to the psychological trauma, plus I've never left the post and have remained ever viligant and untempted. I wish there was someone here with me those sons of bitches. I am unsure when I will sleep tonight I already tried but realized I have to record the events of what happened. Dinner was a bagel with ham. My little cousin is going to spot me some money in order to buy a bunch of crap on Sunday. I do enjoy the solace. I need to write more frequently in order not to forget what happened earlier. There were a lot of funny moments today.

Saturday 8:00 AM

Last night I ended up meeting up with Sam who ended up hanging out with me for a while. Tim and Elena left yet again so I decided fuck it I'ma go get a drink. So Sam and I went to John Harvard's to get some booze. When we returned Emily was in the tent with Tim and Elena suprisingly they weren't pissed at all. Emily had brought two pizzas from papa ginos. We ate about one and a half pizzas all together and shared the rest with people wandering by. Sam put on his wizards cloak for warmth. Don't ask me why... But he did have a wizards cloak. Eventually Slade showed up and started yelling things. That eventually ended with me in a shopping cart being pushed around. Slade/Sam/Crew ended up leaving after a good time. Emily remained in the tent with us for a little while. The best part of that evening was Emily freaking out whenever a car came by. She would open the tent door and poke her head out at each passing car. I compared her reaction to that of a dog's. Whenever she poked her head out I would start making barking noises to make fun of her, "WOOF! WOOF! WOOF! WOOF!" Eventually she left and it was just the 3 of us again. There was an aftermath from Emily though. She is the worlds fucking messiest eater, there were chips everywhere I don't know how she could miss her mouth so spectacularly that a potato chip ended up on the opposite side of the tent as her. I ended up going to sleep around 1 AM. The lights were on the entire time so I could not sense the passage of time from within the tent. Sometimes I woke up and could hear Tim and Elena talking. My response to it the first time was to raise my hand and flip them off so hard that it hurt my hand. The second time it happened which was around 6:00AM I just started screaming obscenities because that's just the way I am. I started yelling about aqua pods and how I must quench my unending thirst. I decided if I were to get another dog it would be named aquapod. Before this though the best buy crew showed up around 4 Am. They were talking about how we are a bunch of dumbasses and I whole heartedly agree. Shortly after they entered the store they started doing cheers and shit. Best Buy is secretly a band of guns for hire. Back to 6 AM some guy showed up and started asking about selling us a PS3. And we were asking if he was selling it for $250 to which he responded no $3. Around 6:30 is when I got up to go to the bathroom at starbucks. As I'm returning some jackass with a leaf blower who is just wandering around blowing shit in random directions because there are no fucking leaves on the ground. The guy is a public nuisance and just stands by our tent for a while with the leaf blower going. At 6:45 a second group of campers show up we officially have neighbors. The guy's name is Oliver and he's pretty awesome... He brought his Nintendo DS so we can metroid battle. Tim and Elena leave once again cause they are tools I started calling people and nobody picked up. The other guy leaves me to watch his stuff and everything is good. The next event in the best buy training session is beginning. A bunch of employees exit the building and a couple start babbling about how they need to constantly drink in order to be happy. About 5 minutes later the rest of the store comes out and lines up.. They keep making jokes about lining up for the wii. Everyone is getting into it and yelling, "WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" I hope Tim and Elena come back soon so I can go get cleaned up. I am alone again.

PS. I went to go to the bathroom in best buy and after I had finished I overheard some guy talking about, "Some guy destroyed the bathroom and I almost vomited" I felt so good after that.

Saturday 1:26 PM

My friend George offered me sexual favors and 60 dollars to cut in front of the Wii line. I said no deal because it would be unfair to the rest of the campers and I don't roll that way. The issue currently is somewhat resolved with my offer for him to spend the night with us i the tent. Tonight is the night of the comet-storm I cannot wait I was also told that drag racing is held in shoppers world late at night. Two things to look forward to tonight. Tim and Elena have entered a relationship like I guessed would happen earlier. Sam made good on his doughnut offer. Oh GOD DAMNIT my pencil just and out of lead this is an unfortunate situation. I may have to go to office max in order to fix this. People keep harassing us over why we are here so Tim crafted a sign using a weird near unreadable flowery font. This sign in-fact stops NOTHING everyone walking by still asks. More crying children appear on the scene, I think children just hate best buy with a passion. My boss bought us lunch today because he is a fucking super hero... Best boss ever. It is colder today than yesterday and it will be significantly colder tonight. I heard its going to be 30 degrees tonight. Its definitely in the upper 30's right now. My neighbors all seem nice. Someone else just moved in next to Oliver.

Saturday 8:30 PM

Holy fuck we are almost done! Thank sweet god! My Esophagus is melting inside of my body. This guy named Mickey bought us 1000 pizzas to feed the troops. 26 People showed up and George (that dirty bitch) did not. Everyone made fun of Tim and Elena in the tent. It was hilarious. It hurts to be alive right now, I think I ate too much. God Damn for the sake of tradition I should puke next to the mansion tent. (Illegible scribbles)

Saturday Night

Since that last entry is so confusing and incoherent I need to fill everything in after the fact. People started showing up at around 6:30 ish and we had a line of about 13 people by then. I met this kid named Mike who had camped out for the PS3 and was running on about 8 hours of sleep for 5 days or so. We started saying completely bullshit answers to the people walking by as to why we were here.

Here is a list of what we said.
-We are camping out for the Xbox
-We are camping out for the Nintendo 64
-We are camping out for the Turbographics 16
-We are camping out for the 3DO
-We are camping out for the sale on Friday
-We really like Best Buy
-We are urban campers, it's a new fad.
-We are time travelers making a pitstop in your time before continuing further into the past. We need to hunt some dinosaurs in order to ensure that an oil pocket will form in this area to make us rich.
-We are here for the revolution
-We are here for the charity
-We are a religious group
-We live here
-Why are you here?
-Do you hear the voices too?

Anyways continuing on with the story this tent of people from Brandeis showed up. They had the biggest tent of them all with three rooms and a patio. We immediately made fun of them and called them the mansion tent, "Yes go back to your mansion and drink your champagne." Also around this time this guy named Billy showed up because he works at best buy. He signed the glorious list that we had made and set up his crap. Which was an air mattress and a sleeping bag, we worried for Billy and the fact that he probably wouldn't survive the night. Next to show up was this guy named Mickey, he asked us if we can reserve a place in line for him if he bought us pizza for the first 3 tents. We said, sure but if you don't come back were gonna cross you off the list. So Mickey leaves and we are unsure of whether he is coming back or not. Slade shows up again and brings the much missed homoerotic tendencies back into the fold. Wow... Anyways Mickey showed up again and brought us about 12-13 pizzas which is way more than we could eat in the first 3 tents. We had our fill and then extended the offer to the rest of the people in line, which they gladly accepted. Even the mansion tent got to eat with us. While we were eating a kid showed up that looked really familiar. I thought he looked a lot like this kid named Chris I used to hang out with.
He responded with, "No its Stephan"
"Oh my god... I used to make fun of you 8 years ago"
"Really?"
"Yeah its Costas you tard!"
"OH SHIT!" and then Stephan basically is in a state of shock and we high five and whatever else people who haven't seen each other in a long time do. So he ate pizza and we talked about the old times of playing Star Fox and how we were neighbors. A bunch of people were hanging out and me and one of my other old friends decide to go to starbucks for hot chocolate. So we did and it was good... Till about half an hour later when the horrible pain started. I couldn't move without hurting. I did the only thing any red blooded American would. I went into the best buy bathroom and started puking like a motherfucker. It went on for like 10 minutes and I was wondering what the people in the other stalls were thinking with this going on. So I end up coming out of best buy again with an empty stomach and the feeling of death is slowly subsiding. I end up talking to some people about it and this guy named Tuttle said, "That was you?" which I responded with, "yeah". He said that I sounded like an ogre in there. Which made everyone laugh which is equal to mission accomplished. So the night went on and the madness started to set in. The sixth tent in the line which was the one right after the mansion tent was filled with Stephan and his buddies. They were the thugs of the line. Some little kids who thought they were gangsters showed up and started yelling things about the ps3 is awesome and the wii is for faggots or something. To which the 6th tent came out of their tent and started talking to them. The little kids started threatening them and I point out the fact to them that the little gangsters are a full 3 heads shorter than the 6th tent group. Fracas avoided! At around 8:06 pm the sixth tent starts glowing and the first 30 seconds of trying to understand what was going on was laughing about pot heads. Then we realized that in order for the tent to glow that much there would need to be an obscene amount of pot. So we went over because the dumbasses had lit something ablaze in their tent. We went over there and told them they were going to die from lack of air or carbon monoxide poisoning. To which they tried to douse the flames by dumping Pepsi on it. This made the fire worth and we heard... Uhhh FUCK and they threw the box out of the tent. The guy from the mansion tent that turned out to be really cool started throwing dirt on the fire. We all laughed at the 6th tent and called them dumbasses, from here on their tent was lovingly called fire tent. So later on Tim of mansion tent decided that it would be a good idea to get tanked so I joined them in going to TGIFridays. I only participated in the first round because I had vomited earlier and didn't want to upset my stomach further. The next big event was fire tent part 2. The dumbasses lit their box on fire again and we came over and told them, "What the fuck is wrong with you guys?" we started laughing and Stephan brought the blazing inferno of a box out and started stomping in it. Luckily his shoe got stuck in the box and almost lit his clothes on fire. So he got out of his shoe and pulled the damn thing out and just used dirt. My little cousin's friend got dropped off and hung out with us in the line. He was number 28 in the list. My friends showed up and set up a vague rave by parking their car next to Mickey's which was on the sidewalk. They opened the trunk and started playing techno. Also they partaked in free pizza which was still available from earlier. Around 2 am I decided to crash for a couple hours. So I went into the tent and fell asleep and I woke up around 4-5 am. I was hungry and in the full state of madness, I talked to Mike who was also suffering from the same thing and decided we needed to go get food at Dunkin Donuts. So we went there and used the bathrooms and got food. I got a bagel with the most butter I've ever seen. It was literally soaking with it through and through. Its like I had more butter than bagel. I'm gonna have to order this again sometime... Anyways we get back to the best buy parking lot. Not much happens of note till around 6:30 ish again when the leaf blower guy shows up and a best buy representative starts talking to us about what we need to do in the line. To which the leaf blower pauses as much as possible near us when the best buy dude is giving his speech. Everyone thinks leaf blower man is an asshole, which he is. At around 7 AM which is an hour before we get the tickets for the Wii people start packing up tents and things and Mickey starts barking out orders for people to get in line. This is why we think Mickey might be some kind of ex military esque guy. Anyways Mickey gets everyone into line and yells a lot and its kinda scarry. I start making jokes about well now hes going to go down the line and execute every 10th man. Anyways we get our tickets and the line disperses. I'm saying, "Well fuck that I've been here for 3 days I'm staying in the fucking line god damnit fucking shit" So me and a bunch of other people sit in line for the last 30 minutes and I call Tim and Elena cause they are lazy fucks and went into their car for warmth. It is really fucking cold out. So best buy opens and this short guy dressed as link comes out and is having way too much fun with his job. The line re forms and starts snaking around in best buy. It was like that snake game where you have to eat the food but not intersect yourself. It was really kinda cool I wish I had taken a picture. I mean I took pictures of absolutely everything else that happened. So this was the moment of truth I was first in line and when I got up to the accessory table my mind blanked. I turned around and asked Tim, "What do I need?" Tim responded with, "You have a bag waiting for you he asked you last night." "Oh." So I with my mind blanked wandered over to the counter and bought my package. I was the first one to get a wii and I stumbled onward to "CONGRATULATIONS!!" and "GO FUCKING TAKE A SHOWER!!!" it was absolutely glorious. When I crossed the threshold of bestbuy into the cold November air. I realized something beautiful, I could leave best buy for the first time in 3 days.

To this day I have not returned.

The Wii is absolutely amazing the games play really well. Wii sports is incredible and you scream bloody murder when someone bowls better than you. Red Steel is also amazing but its harder to learn the controls. People cry and whine at first because they don't know what the hell they are doing but once they figure it out they say that this game is badass. The controls are beautiful once you get used to them and its the best console shooter experience I've ever had. Theres super power moves and sword bashing which add complexity to the game and the ability to glitch out once I figure those out. So I can be totally lame and headshot someone while running across the map. I also got the Dragon Ball Z game which I refuse to spell out fully because I don't know what the hell it means. I scream internet memes while playing it and it doubles the fun. The controls are intense and you wave around in the air while pulling off the super moves. The game gets more fun and entertaining and complex once you learn how to play. I still barely know what I'm doing because the computer completely tools on me. I unlocked 2 characters so far. Only 118 left to go. If you are thinking about getting the Wii or have a friend who has one. Go play with it. You will be converted. I have not had such a good experience with a console since... Ever.

PS.

Pictures will be up once I find the damn cable for the camera.

Large amounts of news for a lack of posts.

2006-11-16T22:37:00.000-05:00

Again I am sorry for the lack of posts recently. I have not been able to play WoW for about 3 weeks because I've had an incredible amount of papers to write. Good news is that I'm not failing any classes. Bad news is however I need to fix up my website before this magazine article hits store shelves. I'm going to be in the december issue of Massive Magazine. Theres an interview in it and I hope I got portrayed in the way I had hoped. Which is a goofy bastard who writes things about a videogame that he played naked.

So heres the bad news. My graphics card shit the bed, which means its artifacting heavilly and I can't get any work done in my regular life or play games till this damn thing is replaced. I won't be able to play wow this weekend till sunday afternoon at least. Which means no posts till Sunday night.

Here we go... heres the reason I wont be able to post till late sunday night. My friend has convinced me that he and I need to sit in front of best buy for three days. By sit I mean camp out for the Wii. I actually couldnt care less for the Wii I mean I'll buy it if it turns out I get paid tomorrow. However if I didn't I'll camp out anyway for the social aspect. I'm a nerd for sociology and I want to know what makes this mass insanity tick. There will be pictres taken and I will report my progress. You get to see me become grungy and creepy over the course of three days.

See ya sunday!

Interesting Facts:
-Naked Warrior is now 18
-I think the other naked projects crapped out...

Artifacts in the posted image:
-My bicep is missing
-One of the verticies from some tree is warped and placed somewhere out in the distance.

RAARRGG!!!

2006-11-08T10:03:00.000-05:00

MUST WRITE MORE PAPERS!!!

BLASPHEMY!

2006-11-03T03:12:00.000-05:00

Well... I had to attend to things in real life and I'm glad I got a little break from WoW. You know... dealing with the physical world is excellent, theres food and things to be had. Oh yeah and papers and midterms and things thats what happened.

Along with dealing with my education I also got to appear on a podcast put on by All Games.

Here is a link to the radio stream.

Its defenatly worth a look because it gets goofy as hell towards the middle of the actual portion I'm speaking in. We get so far off topic its incredible, I love how absolutly crazy that interview was. They have this thing going on where they talk to a MMO corrospondant and I was on last thursday. This thursday was everquest and this guy was serious business. I'm intrigued by the stark contrast between our personalities with myself being this goofy guy whos really playful and doesnt take the game too seriously where he seems to be all about the serious business aspect of this.

Do I count as a hardcore mmo gamer? I mean I don't really take this too seriously but... I did beat the game naked.

Interesting Facts:
-Naked Warrior is now level 17

Naked Troll Project Raids Ony!

2006-10-24T21:47:00.000-04:00

Today was my very first raid as a naked troll. It was a pick up group and nobody bugged me about my lack of armor. I think mainly because I was lost in the sea of people and nobody cared. My DPS was better than a couple other hunters but my survivability lacks something. I made it to phase 3 and then I got the crap feared out of me and I died on one of the cracks cause nobody explained it to me. All went well and good I never got yelled at and I'm sure the next run will go much better. ANYWAYS ONY DIED AND I"M HAPPY!

I decided to capture this wonderful moment on video so I get to edit it and put it on youtube!

Speaking of youtube... I watched something so utterly hillarious that I could not stop laughing for an hour. My ribs hurt so bad after I was done. I normally don't do this but heres a link. About 50% of the people I showed it to found it funny. Elephants are funny.

Interesting Facts:
-On the Ony run I got the black dragon sinew.

Lol this is my raid gear.

2006-10-23T00:54:00.000-04:00

So I finished up the ony key and killed Drak, and now I decided to go on a uhh UBRS run with a bunch of people from my guild. Cause they are drunken awesome mofos and apparently this is the fastest UBRS run I've ever been on. It was some very good times, lots of swearing lots of random bursts of rage. Some people in my guild said something along the lines of, "I knew you were naked but I didn't know you did this all the time."

In all seriousness I think rings and necklaces might be a good investment for me, I don't really know why I never wore them before aside from the fact that they are equippable. These things can really add to my crit chance and make me somewhat more usefull. So I get to twiddle stats on jewlery to get the most dps output possible. Or I could just go for fire resistance cause that stuff is sweet.

I switched to marksmanship to increase my awesome DPS, and HOLY CRAP did it make a difference. Now instead of hitting from 100-200 now I hit for 300-400 with auto shot. I crit for 1k off a multi shot which was pretty crazy. I also crit for 2.2k on a aimed shot, I assume that I can probably get a higher crit out of that.

Ony... I'm callin you out!

Interesting Facts:
-The Beast always kills me.

I killed a few dragons!

2006-10-21T02:29:00.000-04:00

So I'm 2/4's of the way done with the world dragon portion of my onyxia key, this damn thing takes way too long to finish its been a week. I've been told that I'm gonna hate UBRS after running it so much, I'd have to say that its actually one of my favorite instances in the game. I love the giant monsters and the amount of teamwork that goes in to the fights. I think I'm gonna love raiding when I get into it.

I got to level 16 with my warrior, things are getting vaguely easier now because I just got higher level skills.. I might get to 20 this weekend on him but I have a bunch of projects to work on. You know projects outside of the naked troll project.

Interesting Facts:
-EMILY ITS ME COSTAS
-I've listened to paniq almost exclusivly the past week.
-"Screen Captured!"

Gotta kill a buncha dragons!

2006-10-18T23:39:00.000-04:00

I'm at the wonderful part in the Onyxia Key quest chain where I get to hunt down and kill 3-4 dragons. However the real point is tonight I have gained acceptance among a raid group, I gained their respect as opposed to being called the noob without armor. They didn't boot me from the group which is really awesome of them, probably because I am the only hunter. They didn't actually notice I wasnt wearing armor till the ninja costume wore off which is probably a really good thing. Thats what I assume secured my ranking among them because they didnt get a chance to descriminate against my lack of armor. I need to load up a DPS meter on the computer I've been working on for the past week or so because I havent been able to keep tabs on how I rank against my peers. This I went through UBRS (upper black rock spire) we went the whole way, the biggest problem I faced was The Beast. He was gunning for me for some reason it was really odd. Anyways I managed to kite Drak sucessfully which was a great experience. In fact I managed to not take any damage during that.

On the second front of this war I got my warrior to level 15 because I'ma lazy punk, hes a pain in the ass to level because he constantly dies. If you see a naked tauren warrior out in the barrens running from green mobs... Thats me. Its pretty spectacular to see the massive differences between a hunter and a warrior in regards to this. I think my hunter could actually take more hits than my warrior is at this level. The major difference aside from class is race and I'm not sure if that has anything to do with it. I use warstomp all the time and I would not trade it for anything. That racial is my bread and butter, I use it in any fight with multiple mobs and it saves my ass. Right now I'm using a mace and a sheild. Even with the armor from the sheild I get trounced. Hell I tried using defender stance for a little while, I just got my ass beat worse. I cannot wait till I get dual weild. That will probably be in a couple days.

Interesting Facts:
-Dragon Eyes are fun to collect!
-I'm a hero!
-New Naked Rogue project started.

A new beginning

2006-10-16T20:41:00.000-04:00

Round Two of the Naked Troll Project has begun! I have infact been building a warrior while I've been tooling around trying to get an onyxia key. I've made it to level 14 so far in order to keep up pace with the Naked Priest Project. I'm noticing some big differences already and the big idea of is this possible keeps popping up in my head. I don't know if you can actually do this one, I've never played a warrior before so I really don't know what I am doing.

My current thoughts on this are that levels 1-20 are going to be the hardest because from what I know you don't get as many offensive skills as you do post level 20. Dual weild is going to make this a whole lot easier. As of right now the hardest levels I've faced have been 5-12. 14 so far seems like a breeze but then again I went to the AH and bought a green weapon and things have gone much better since then. As I go along this time I will be releasing a map of the world that will update as I reach grinding spots so people can follow in my footsteps. Screw paying for a grinding guide. You've got a free one right here.

Interesting Facts:
-Naked Tauren Warrior resides on Mal'Ganis and the name is Greenhammer.

The Naked Collaboration

2006-10-16T16:08:00.000-04:00

Apparently the nakedness thing is enough of a problem for someone to make a note of it in LFG. "be good or be geared"

Alright so I'm noticing theres about 2 other people working on these naked projects. My current plan is to actually use this website as sort of a hub to information on all of these naked projects.
Yes the goal is that every class needs to be done. At least three are in progress right now. Send me an email or drop a comment if you are interested in joining the project listings. (community?)

Project...............Status

Warlock.............N/A
Hunter...............60 Getting Attunements
Mage..................N/A
Priest.................13 Active
Druid..................N/A
Shaman..............N/A
Rogue.................N/A
Paladin...............N/A
Warrior..............11 Active

I have infact started a warrior, and although he is not a troll I will be posting his progress on this blog. There will be a more indepth post later tonight.

Interesting Facts:
-Operation Tinfoil armor is sucessfull.

Operation Tinfoil Armor

2006-10-14T17:26:00.000-04:00

Well now that I'm 60 its getting much harder to get into groups without wearing armor. At this point I really have 3 options.

1. I could lie and say that I am the victim of a keylogger. This has worked every time I've used it, which happens to be once. I don't really like lieing to get a group, it feels so immoral.

2. I could stay armorless and gain infamy and get even less groups, and stick to groups of friends or guildmates. Hopefully the damage isnt completely done here and I still have a chance to redeem myself on this server.

3. I could put on level 1 gear, like tattered leather armor and stuff like that to give me the look that I am actually wearing armor. Infact I went to durotar today and bought clothes off the newbies backs for 1g a peice. Or... I could get high level gear, and break it and just not take it off.

Personally I like the third option the best, I think its absolutly hillarious. If this was LB I'm sure I could easily get a group but instead I'm on Mal'Ganis which doesn't know me and I don't really have anyone to vouch for me. If you attempt a project like this, make friends early and try to stay within their range. Also dont switch servers because you will lose your "street cred".

So now I have the auxillary tinfoil armor. Technically its as effective as being naked. Doesn't add armor or statistics, I'm still golden. Although I have yet to use it, with the last rend run going sucessfull and nobody bailing or discriminating against me for my lack of armor.

Interesting Facts:
-Oh god I hope nobody who groups with me that hates me reads this.
-If you do group with me and are one of my supporters don't let this out.
-Rend run completed!

50th post I hate LBRS

2006-10-13T22:11:00.000-04:00

Lower Black Rock Spire(LBRS) is the most mind numbing, buggy, obnoxious, terrible instance I have ever run. I hate it more than I hate Maradon, and I really hate Maradon. To define this hatred you basically need to take everything you like about something and then pervert it just enough that its annoying. This is what LBRS is like, a steaming pile of crap that used to be a delicious pie. I can't be saying all this stuff without anything to back it up can I? Here are some awesome reasons why LBRS is a festering diseased wretch of a dungeon.

1. It has a massive bug. There is a hole in the floor where you can fall into, and then you die. This is a pretty easy hole to fall into also. This isnt the problem, the problem is that when you die this way you have to go back to the instance and then you get teleported back to the graveyard. Then you have to run back a second time.

2. The later parts of the instance are actually easier than the beginning. We wiped 3 times on the beginning area unlike the later areas which we just tore through like a fat kid on a cake.

3. The dungeon takes so long that quite literally the only two people in the group who remained from the original set was me and the other hunter.

Good news however, my group prevailed over the 400 hours that it took to get through that damn cesspit. I hopefully never have to return there for my very soul will shatter if I do. Now I get to go kill rend for the third part in the glory and wonder of the Onyxia/Drakefire Amulet chain.

Interesting facts:
-Its the 50th post just incase anyone cares.

Plans for the future are currently being drawn.

2006-10-11T21:24:00.000-04:00

I love LBRS I haven't sucessfully ran it. Or hell I have not even started the instance. It seems like a pain in the ass to get considering It took me around 4 hours to get a full group. But wait thats not all just before we enter the instance its collapses into itself like the death of a star or like. I need to get this damn Ony Key so I can raid.

I must discuss things with my cohorts as to what my next big goals should be. I obviously can't leave the 400 billion newcomers to this website hanging. I need to plod on with new firm ideas that will shake the very earth off its orbit. What I need is a plan which I am currently drawing up. Some of the ideas I am toying with right now might be impossible goals.

The most probable ideas what I have right now and am currently working for is:
1. Kill Onyxia
2. Get as high rank as possible in battlegrounds before BC comes out and borks the system.

In other news I snuck into stormwind, and rode the Deeprun Tram while waiting for LBRS groups. Bringing a smile to the faces of alliance everywhere. So I compiled a video of me dancing with a bunch of alliance and basically tooling around in aliance territory.

Interesting Facts:
-Initially I was too lazy to install my video editor. But after about an hour of dicking around with Windows Movie Maker I deemed it trashy and was forced to install an alternative.
-Hopefully posts from here on out will be more normal and less to do with the internets reaction to my project and more with the project itself.

WoW... word spreads fast hyuk

2006-10-11T00:04:00.000-04:00

I'm creating a list of websites that I had to search down that actually have a mention of me on them. Here is the list as of now in the order that I found them. Please note that none of these are actually directly responsible by me. The digg article came out of nowhere and it exploded from then on. I give my greatest gratitude to you mystery person who placed my article at digg.com Without you none of this would have happened.

digg - Guy Gets to Level 60 in WoW...Naked

Naked Troll Project reaches its goal - World of Warcraft News - QJ.NET

One naked Troll, a dream, and a lot of free time - WOW Insider

Paladinsucks.com

0 to 60 in Skivvies - Kotaku

This forum post is pretty sweet.

Apparently now NTProject spans cross cultures. (dutch website)

The post over at worldofwar.net

Interesting Facts:
-Promote the promoters?
-Allakazahm data fixed.
-Tired and weary from two nights of paper writing.
-Got booted from a BRD group for not wearing armor.
-Mysteriously the blog unpublished itself. I hope this doesnt happen again.

I had a chat with a GM after I leveled.

2006-10-10T18:10:00.000-04:00

Here is approximately how it went. The order of some lines were altered in order to make it flow better for reading.

GM : ::The ground rumbles beneath your feet and a bald head thrusts upward, dirt spraying in all directions.::
hello
GM : *Cough* *hack* *cough* Greetings, Juffowup. Game Master here! How are you doing today?
Juffowup : I love your flair for showmanship
Juffowup : Well I went from level 1 to 60 without wearing armor and I want an official response to this
GM : Aye I had a chance to check out your website, Nice work =) thanks for petitioning about your great feat, what can I help you with?
Juffowup : I have many questions to ask :P
Juffowup : Was this supposed to be possible from the beginning?
GM : Well I'm not a developer, but I would assume that since you achieved it then it was made to be possible, only extremely difficult and time consuming

Juffowup : so I've talked to two previous GM's and I asked them if they knew what I was doing and they made reference that they have. Is this true?
GM : That the developers knew, or that they personally knew? Because I personally had no idea it was quite a surprise =)
Juffowup : yeah if they actually knew about me and is the reaction you had a good or bad one?
Juffowup : I've noticed some interesting changes for burning crusade that would actually effect me they are changing the way pets work in regards to equipment it feels like a direct response to what I have done. Especially considering the timing of it.
GM : I cant speak for what the development team is aware of. But my reaction was positive, its quite impressive to me
Juffowup : Thankyou
Juffowup : The whole thing about it being time considering my /played is only 14 days 13 hours which is actually faster than what it took most of my friends to get through the game
GM : I would think the idea is to make it hard, but not impossible to achieve goals in the game through more than one method or playstyle.
As for your time taken, I do know of many players who have been able to go to 60 in about 5-6 days played
Juffowup : Alright would there be a way for me to talk to the developers about this? Or can you pass the word on so at least someone that deals with balance knows?
GM : Well we have no direct line here =) the best way to communicate with them would be through our suggestions forum, which is specifically read every day for feedback and ideas on topics like this
Juffowup : alright thanks
GM : I'm sure what you've done would garner a response from the community team which may be able to give you some information.
Juffowup : Alright I'll let you go thankyou for your time

In addition to this I just want to get this out of the way so all the content that I had set up for level 60 would be in one post.

I have to bring a couple weird events up which probably does not have anything to do with me and pure coincidence.
1.) I mentioned earlier multiple times that the blizzard was waiting for me to gain level 60 to release the hunter talents. The day after the level the hunter talents are released.
2.) Hunter class changes in regards to pets seem like a direct response to what I was doing. They changed the pets so that they would scale up with bonuses from the armor.

Interesting Facts:
-Well I lost my wacom pen a few weeks ago and have been too lazy to order a new one. I tried to draw a picture for this post but I couldnt get anything that looked good out.
-If I had a picture of a GM that would be awesome.

Naked Dance Party

2006-10-09T23:56:00.000-04:00

Well its not exactly the one I described earlier. But it is drunken and people are naked. Theres no GM's though but its still awesome.

Holy crap the internet found me!

2006-10-09T19:52:00.000-04:00

I have two new goals. I'm gonna get as far up the PVP ranking as I can before BC hits so I'm not permenantly labled "Scout Juffowup" and I'm also going to get ready for raiding.

I got 2000 hits yesterday. I guess that final forum post really hit its mark. And today... I got 14000 hits.

I've figured out what I want to do as a temporary fix for not grinding my naked ass up any more levels. Well it can be considered a form of grinding, I'm gonna see how far I can get up in the PVP rankings over the next few weeks.

Also I've talked to my guild about letting me raid naked. They actually seem to be ok with it. They are going to help me get the leaf from Molten Core so I can actually have a decent weapon to raid with. Over the next week I will be trying to get the Ony Key so I can properly raid.

Oh uhh two other important things happened.

About 3 people sent me tells that they saw me on the internet. The first one saw me through the blog and the forum post. But now these two new people saw me through Digg.com Holy shit... I'm on digg. Thats all I could respond with.

Speaking of which one of them is helping me get MC attunement at this very second. Thats what is in the image for this post.

This is a link to the Digg post

Interesting Facts:
-Holy shit I'm on digg
-I wonder how long till slashdot picks up on me.
-I did not actually post this on digg. I just found out about it.

THE FINAL POST!? I think not!

2006-10-08T16:19:00.000-04:00

Level 60 baby!!!

Now for the lengthy recap of the situation and the progress I have made up until this point.

In late june I was coerced into playing WoW again by my cousins. I decided I would play again because they all happened to be on one server and I had nothing better to do with my life. My reason for quitting last time was that I was bored with the game and questing had become very tedious. So something needed to be changed or else I would not be able to play the game for a long period of time. So I looked at the game for some time, trying to figure out a way to make this interesting to me again. Some kind of challenge that I could do to make the game difficult. My biggest complaint was that the game was too easy. So I really wanted to make the game hard so I could not get bored while playing.

I chose to play through the entire game without armor. But what class and race would this be remotely possible with? My first instinct was shaman because they are a really beefy class. They can heal, deal burst damage and tank fairly well. The swiss army knife of classes. This idea quickly passed as I realized the incredible amount of armor dependancy they had. They needed armor for their mana pool and to protect themselves from harm, they are a melee class after all. Next idea was a mage but that wouldnt really be that difficult considering all they do is sit in the back and cast some kind of missle. Here we go I decided to pick the class that I think this would be the most possible with. A Hunter because the pet would take the hits for me therefore I wouldnt have to take damage. I could dual weild so I could get a bunch of stats on my weapons and basically be good to go.

Next up was the choice of race, It was between troll and orc really. I really had to weigh between stun resistance and regeneration + berzerking. Stun resistance is great for PVP but berzerking is good for all around awesome. 10-30% increase in attack speed is pretty great this is including casting, melee, ranged. I am fairly sure most of my characters from now on will be troll. I also really like the 10% regeneration in combat for health. Thats a huge bonus if you have a ton of spirit gear. I want to try making a spirit warrior at some point and see what happens.

My first hypothesis was that I would not make it past level 25 so I needed all the help I could get. I decided to wear gloves and boots to help me out. As I continued to level things just got easier and easier. I kept pushing my estimate of ending forward by 10 levels each time. By level 40 I had gotten rid of anything that I wore aside from trinkets (which didnt add any stats). So I was then fully naked and continued my endless grinding. Infact it was more entertaining to me to sit there grinding in one spot than to actually wander around doing quests. I also enjoyed being alone so I can talk on AIM or listen to music. It was actually kind of soothing to just wander in circles annihilating enemies. Althought this does not mean I didnt go on any instances. Instances are where I met most of my friends on Lightning's Blade.

Some where in the 50's My friends started playing again on Mal'Ganis so I did a character transfer and changed server. My name changed from Jumba to Juffowup which is unfortunate but a decent name none the less. CURSE YOU MAL'GANIS JUMBA I WILL FIND YOU!

Anyways back to the story closing in on 60 was the most frustrating experience I've had in this game. Level 60's were almost constantly farming the spots that I deemed decent to grind at. Infact many places were really terrible places to grind. The exp did not ramp up with level past 55. I may have been grinding at the wrong spots but it was just terrible and obnoxious in the amount of time you had to spend to level. EPL was the worst. I basically spent level 46-60 in Azshara. Which was pretty nice considering that there were alot less people there than in EPL.

I'm actually kind of nervous as to what I do now considering I finally made it to 60. Do I wear armor? If so should I restrict myself to specific kinds? I've been BGing and I'm doing average. I just need to get used to this dealing with people who have insane gear thing. The future is uncertain.

I do know some things. I want to raid.

Forum post
/played 14 days 10 hours Level 60

607 xp to 60

2006-10-08T03:16:00.000-04:00

I'm retiring for the night. I want to have a drunken party with the GM's and also I want to take some BG PVP footage before I get into the 60's zone where I will most undoubtably get constantly stomped.

FUCKING SHIT I'M LEVEL 59!!!

2006-10-07T02:22:00.000-04:00

Anticipation is quite litterally threatening to tear my body apart like the vicious angry anus of a black hole. Taking what was once beautiful and churning it into billions of particles and spewing it forth as a gamma ray burst. The longing for being able to just dick around Orgrimmar is excruciating. Alright all previous level 60's before me... I'm calling you out. I fucking hate you stop camping the damn spawns I need to gain exp off of. That is the largest problem with this project and its not even a problem based on armor. Its the excruciating grinding at the end its just boring as hell. With the addition of people jacking my monsters it makes it a grueling boring experience. I long for the times I can just be alone while I endlessly mill about an area searching for glorious glorious exp. I have some respite due to the fact that its all about to be over soon.

I am still unsure of wether I will continue not wearing armor at the end. I have conflicting ideas of what I should do. One of my friends pointed out a interesting fact that continuing to not wear armor is like refusing to stop running after finishing a marathon. The problem with this is I dont know if I will actually be done with this project. Do I need to go through the raids and get epic weapons? I need to find a proper point of closure for this project because I cannot possibly sustain it the way I have past 60.

To this date. I have not suffered a single issue because of my lack of armor aside from descrimination from fellow players. However most have given me positive feedback there are some who hate me for unknown reasons.

Things I can do to potentially salvage a secondary goal aside from leveling to 60.
1. Getting high ranked in BG.
2. Collect the teir sets and put them in bags for safe keeping
3. Create a second character to do this with.

/played 13 days 20 hours

Interesting Facts:
-Players to Bot Ratio on Mal'Ganis 1:100
-There will be MUCH more profanity in the 60 post.
-Level 60 is going to be a huge post.
-Gonna fraps getting level 60

57!!!

2006-09-30T01:13:00.000-04:00

Alright 3 levels left to go this is going to be incredible. I've already started making plans for what I am going to do at 60. Hopefully these will be realized once I reach that level.
1. Get raid gear and put it in a bag
2. Get high ranking in BG
3. Get people to eat bugs with my vast sums of unused money.
4. Get Engineering up

My god... the grinding is becoming mind numbing. It just... hurts to play. I'm gonna get 60 this weekend I'm sure. Hell yes.

/played 12days 22 hours